The end of a new beginning

When in late March I found that I no longer had an exclusive relationship with Anne, it was a big shock to me.  After 13 years together and with both of us in our mid-70s, I had hoped that we were together for good.  But there were things that were important to Anne which I was not giving her so I did not for a moment blame her for looking elsewhere for those things. And getting them has drawn her very close to G., her new bloke.

She told G. from the beginning that I would remain important in her life so he has accepted that, apparently not without some reluctance.  And Anne has remained true to her word. We have continued to have evenings together, though less frequently than before.  And we enjoyed those evenings, just as we always did

I was however rather depressed and upset about the new realities for some time.  I felt alone.  I was not of course alone and both Jenny and Joe were very supportive of me, mainly by having me over for dinners on nights when I was not seeing Anne.

Gradually, however, the new situation between Anne and myself became clear to me.  Despite her engrossing times with G. it was clear that Anne really did want as much as possible of our old relationship to continue.  I give her things that she treasures that G. cannot give her.

So we had a big discussion last Thursday night in which we both agreed that our relationship was permanent, which was what I wanted. Because of her engrossing relationship with G. however, we will dine together only once a week until the lockdown ends.

I am now at peace and in good spirits with the situation between us and expect to remain so.  The transition in my relationship with Anne is complete. Our new arrangements do include me seeking the company of other old ladies if I can find any interesting enough.

Plastic surgery

I had a rather big slice taken out of the skin on my lower left leg by a plastic surgeon.  It did not go well. As soon as I got home it started to bleed.  The surgeon eventualy had to come back to fix it up. 

The surgeon prescribed Augmentin to deal with any resultant infection.  I took it and it did seem to kill any bugs but it made me chuck late that night.  So not a good day.

Changes

Relationships between Anne and myself have been rather "up in the air" recently, largely because of Anne being too embarrassed to tell me much about what has been going on in her life. We have however just had a frank discussion about that so we now both have clarity about one-another's feeings and intentions

It turns out that Anne is in love with G., wants him in her bed every night and looks forward to many years with him.  Marvellous what can happen in your 70s!

In those circumstances, it is surprising that she still has any time for me in her life but she does. She describes our relationship as "precious" to her and that she wants to continue it in a reduced way.  We have agreed that we will continue to spend one night of the week together, and probably more after the shutdown.

So the fact that she continues to have affection for me amid her new life is very pleasing to me.  It would have upset me greatly to lose her altogether after 13 years.  I will however have to find others to give me company on other nights of the week.

Surviving

I am rather surprised to find myself still alive in 2020 but I am not quite at death's door.  Yes. I am very feeble but I get by fairly well.  At age 76, I think I now qualify as one of the "frail elderly" but, with care, I can still enjoy my version of a normal life.  I deteriorated quite a lot after my recent major surgeries on my neck. That was a real watershed.

I have taken a number of preautions to cope with my weakened state.  My doctor has signed me up for a disabled driver permit so I don't have to walk far in carparks and I have taken a number of precautions in that big danger area for the elderly, the bathroom.  I now have a waterproof warning gadget that I can take into the shower.  If I fall over I can use it to ring someone to help me up.  I also have  a grab rail above the bath with which I may  be able to save myself if I slip. And I also have a steel armchair by "Evacare" around the toilet to help me up and down.  I am a great believer in precautions.


$59.35 at Bunnings

Because I don't get out much these days, Anne has another bloke with whom she goes on outings.  I met him recently.  He seems a decent bloke.  She wants to keep seeing me but only on Tuesday and Thursday nights during the virus shutdowns. I am very glad of some continuation.  She and I have just had a discussion about it.

And the Coronavirus restrictions  haven't had too big an impact on me -- mainly because I live a pretty reclusive life anyway these days.  I mainly get out to go shopping these days and that is still allowed. And a gathering of two people is still allowed.  So when Anne and Jenny separately come to visit me that qualifies.  In terms of the regulations, they are making a compassionate call on the frail elderly.

The current restrictions do bother me in one way, however.  I have a lifelong habit of dining out, particularly for breakfast in recent years.  Now that dining out is forbidden, that does affect me